I hate you but I'm not in hate with you
Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
So i looked up from her cooch and there was her ex-boyfriend
Awkward
Soooo billy mays was on coke. I'm about as shocked as I was when Clay Aiken came out
apparently i saved myself a memo last night titled "cake" and all it says is "i love it so much"
He just broke up w his most recent gf again, wish I could message her and be like it's not you he's gay.
I won the booty shaking contest by mooning the whole bar
My head is pounding and I need an ice pack for my vag. Successful friendsgiving!
OH FOR FUCKS SAKE! SOMEONE TOOK ME FOR A GODDAMN PROSTITUTE!! IM WEARING LEG WARMERS!!! THAT IS LIKE THE LEAST HOOKERISH THING TO WEAR!
On one hand it was kinda weird his girlfriends stuff was at his apartment. On the other hand it was kinda nice because she had great shampoo
the best part was at the strip club when he said he was "here to pick up my wife. she's up on stage.....wait that's my aunt". only in Ottawa.
I've spent all afternoon taking and editing selfies. The life of a bimbo is truly tiring.
I just bought a bong from a hot dog stand.
Brother gave me a harry potter philosophy book for xmas we need to get stoned and talk about this.
i just woke up in my dog's bed, on my parents floor, my outfit on backwards, and a bottle of lube poured down my pocket.
Randomize
