She said as long as i don't wake her up she doesn't care what hole i use.
Got yourself a keeper right there.
Dude, I just went to take a piss and looked at my ballsack... Underneath was labled "L" and "R"
'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
he was humming party in the usa while we were having sex.
I just woke up in a puddle of boob sweat. Definitely time to consider a reduction.
despite contrary belief, getting peanut butter off your balls is not as easy as it sounds
I prob couldn't even get his attention if I had a dick growing out of my forehead
Some guy just stopped me in the bar and asked if I had a shot named after me at another bar called God damn my VaJana hurts? He already knew my name was Jana so I couldn't deny it!
He made me cum 7 times AND I nearly drowned him during that 69 in the back of a ford focus. Yeah I should get my gynocologist.
I just hit your bf in the face with a mustard bottle and the guy at the table next to us bowed down to me.
Grandpa just put 6 jello shots on his plate. My aunt tried to take them away; he flipped her off. Living in the retirement home has hardened him.
you made out with another girl for some wings
He's just been a dick since he set his face on fire. I just wanted to eat a fucking hot dog.
Yo i still have 5 hrs left of work. I should not be this drunk
Grumpy Cat is dead and fuck EVERYTHING.
Randomize
