Passing las posas road. In a world of pain. Im trying to piss in a bottle through the hole in my crotch. I wish i had a bigger dick.
i was unaware that anal sex sometimes ends with shit on the bed.
I had to move some guys boxers out of the dryer. This is the closest I'll be getting to dick this month.
told weddin planner we wanted to work in ceremonial body shots before vows. she hasnt reponded yet...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just feel like Im gonna be remembered as that one RA guy that used to sell weed
I'm stoned and just shared 4 cookies with this chicks dog
They're raisins though so they're healthy. No worries.
Hungover and I may throw up in my therapist's office. Maybe he is right about my drinking
Second time this week margarita night turned homoerotic
I've never wanted to punch a 94 year old woman in the vagina, and then call her next of kin to tell them I just muff punched their Gam Gam until today.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm disgusted with myself. I feel like I need 10 boxes of Summer's Eve and a baptism.
I feel like your personal Bdsm barbie...
I’m drunk and naked and looking for my charger - title of my autobiography.
In any case. I fucked a married couple recently. Know what a straight person would've done there? Been super weirded out by 1/3 of the genitals there, that's what.
she has no right to get mad at us for drinking during the wedding. she's the one that chose the bridesmaid dresses with pockets.
couldn't remember his name. introduced him as 'mr multiple orgasms'
Randomize