I tried to explain to him that we just wanted a stereotypical black friend to be in our group. He didn't take it too well... Never take me to the bar again.
We drank a $4 handle of tequila until 5 am. Please think about that.
You weren't a difficult drunk to take care of. I just had to stop you from plunging the toilet once or twice.
We enjoyed our moment of partial gayness together
Woke up shivering behind the titty bar, With the worst leg cramps. I'm like a poster boy for responsibility.
he told me while inside me and mid thrust that he's dreamed of that moment since high school... awkward
Beer and tomahawks! Not gonna end well!
The trash can in my living room is full of Popsicle sticks and my vibrator has taken up permanent residence on my coffee table. I'm not doing anything productive. Clearly.
sent a snap of my boobs out to my FWB his response was what happened to your other nipple ring.. how do I say it got ripped out by my other FWB last week without sounding like a slut
The teenager outdrank all of us. All. Of. Us. I woke up and she was getting everyone water and fruit snacks. I give up.
Also your Swedish friend who's name I don't remember is really good in bed.
*Norwegian
So I was laying on the couch reading a book and he texted me. All I saw was the image of him spitting on my vagina last night in the moonlight. I gagged.
Let’s try it, I’ve never had a bad time with sex, tacos and beer.
You’re going to be a doctor, and I’m going to be a trophy wife. We both have goals
come on Dane.. ive been there. im like the female version of you, except with morals
Randomize
