I just got hit in the face by an old lady love handle.
eating taco bell the same day as formal = probably a bad idea
Side note, we are 25 fighting over our sophmore year RAs Drunk facebook attention
I started drinking at around 8.. Started heavily drinking around 815.
Im sitting on the exxon bathroom floor, idk if its healthy but it sure is cold
Wearing the flip cup varsity team sweatshirt was the best descision of my life.
My judgement was not "clouded". My judgement was in the midst of a fucking hurricane or something ridiculous.
I will never in my life forget you letting the cat lick your tongue
Fun new game when high: sorting socks. Took forever. Was awesome.
I was out with the drag queens until 7am. This is the hangover I needed to kick my ass back to sobriety. Dear Virgin Mary, fuck my life.
Really? A fat girl?
I'm walking her back. Chill out.
She is a nice girl okay. For some reason we are in my room though.
No it'll be my boobs and the luge part will be from my nipples. Everyone will be sucking beer from my perfectly sculpted and partially melted tits.
Despite popular belief cocaine is not a good pre-workout
my favorite part of this morning was sitting at the gynecologist smelling like cigarettes and wearing yesterday's clothes.
I remember reading the word "lift" so I did. The alarn went off, and I thought to myself "what dumbass pulls the fucking fire alarm?" and then I realized it was me...
Randomize
