Just made a makeshift menthol by rolling a listerine strip into a regular cigarette... Poor? Who, me?
He's married, a coworker, and a smoker. not sure which personal rule broken i'm most ashamed of...
The goblet must only be used for good. And vodka. And anything t-pain would be proud of.
since i'm not going, you must continue my tradition of flashing every person there.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Your CAR. Is in a LAKE. I'd say "a big mess" is a pretty conservative description of the situation.
Getting stoned and sitting front row in a legal class.. Not my best idea
I just gave her a sobriety test in the middle of the baking aisle.
And the results, officer?
She's fucked.
If you ever insult pizza rolls again, I will dragon kick you in the throat
Since Josh is going to be Carl Sagan for Halloween, he bought a turtleneck and sportsman jacket. It's all my nerd fantasies come true.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need time to grow out my leg hair and not be sad anymore
its 3am and I'm taking a bubble bath, this is what taking a day off work at 30 looks like
It's 5AM and I just stirred weed butter into ramen noodles. This is not where I expected to be at 30. ...But, hey, getting high off noodles.
The only people who really get me are strippers and mascots for sports teams.
I put on that one song on Titanic so he'd fall asleep. When I was positive he'd passed out in a drunken fit, he outstretches his arms and says "I'm flying, Jack.."
Dont be alarmed when you come homeand see a guy handcuffed to your bed. His name is james. Ill uncuff him when I get home
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