FYI you just passed out mid-blow job. Consider this my letter of resignation.
hey you knew what you were in for when i showed up with 2 fifths of Jim. plus i left money to pay for a new sink
6 margaritas later and free shots of tequila, i woke up with a fat lip and they said i blew my nose in a slice of bread
BEER BONG IN THE STOCKROOM COME IN TO WORK TODAY
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He had a shameless baby voice when he was talking to my dog. There's no way I'm making it through the night with my clothes on.
It was your ex but it was not eighties night, it was pudding wrestling. And either thank you or I'm sorry depending on the state of my pants left on the doorstep
I sat on the toilet and peed through my jeans, then I pissed the bed and blamed him...do you think well have a 2nd date?
And think got sick again from going outside naked. Word to all females...don't try the naked trench coat thing.
But once you explained how to fill cupcakes with semen I realize you were harmless and right on my level.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
there's a drunk hobo under the bridge wearing a jester hat and screaming at women
Maybe the problem is guy has to ask his wife if he can go out to lunch with his girlfriend for an hour...
You live 7 mins away and I'm leaving in 10 mins. At this point sex before work is impossible.
Challenge accepted. Be naked in 6 mins.
Reasons why I'm always right: I am older, I am wiser, I have a larger penis
What's an appropriate outfit for wearing to hangout with a girl you've talked to once, and had a 4way with?
HAVE BEEN SPEAKING IN RUSSIAN ACCENT FOR 5 HOURS
SHIRT GONE
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