great time with ya sorry i wasn't one of the three guys you wanted to stay with
Just fucked my roommate on the first night of our 12 month lease. 2010 will be awkward.
i did make 45 jello shots and that makes me feel more productive then any paper would
His health insurance plan WILL NOT cover Lasix surgery but it WILL cover 100% of a penis enlargment operation...
I will be sticking my dick in something this weekend. You can either be that something or not. Your decision.
all time personal low: room service guy going "You want french fries AND onion rings???"
It's stupid hot. I just want to be laying in a bathtub full of margaritas
The best part of that night wasn't even the sex, it was listening to her explain to her boyfriend why she was naked in her room while I hid in her closet.
I'm willing to share. He can have sloppy seconds.
We had sex in his hot tub. Then we saved a mouse that almost drown in his pool. We celebrated our heroism with more sex.
Just had a threesome with a married couple.
Stop living my dream.
I got really stoned and got my certification as an ordained minister. How productive has your day been?
So...a chick sucked my crank...now her dog is licking my feet. I feel like a pharoh on vacation.
Everyone else's "needs" are getting in the way of my alcoholism.
My hands smell like vagina and ham.
Randomize
