Nyc is like a mosaic of my failed dates.
...she's taking her top off and singing songs from Anastasia. I swear to God were solumates.
I hate the Packers so much, I wouldn't cheer for them if they were playing al Qaeda.
i remember too much of last night for it to have been successful
It starts with an S and ends with arah just gave me a bj.
Yeah I'm gunna date him. I figure its regular sex and maybe feelings will come in time...it worked for arranged marriages...
Apparently, we were running around the apartment, singing into pickles, the routinely slapped our passed out friends with them.
I did nothing besides stay sober all night, I walked home to find max naked knocking cups off the counter with his cock lol
I want to apologize but I don't know how. Do I just say "sorry for OD'ing on your couch"? I think that just sounds weird.
3 2 1 whiskey
Jesus christ. I put you on speaker when you called me last night and you told me to brush my teeth with a dick.
Thanks for being my pregnancy scare Sherpa...
I'm just going to ride dicks all the way to the to the gates of hell
its 8 and I'm HUNGOVER!! how is that possible??
I dunno what to tell you sport. Short of having a shock collar on, you're gonna wanna hook up with people.
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