I couldnt find her vag and just started laughing uncontrollably. She was not pleased. Neither was i.
M WATCHING THE HISTORY CHANNEL AND IT SAID THAT WHEN THE LUST PART OF THE BRAIN IS ACTIVATED THE JUDGEMENT PART IS NOT. THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
Between cock and motorcycle I'm glad I don't have to sit at work tomorrow
Frozen waffles and wine. Loneliness-party of one
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's tuesday, which means cocktails followed by cocktales.
Just found my bra in a bag of chips on the kayak floating about the pond. Sure sign of a good night
I'm wearing a shirt that says "birthday girls #1 homo" ...what has my life come to?
He offered to teach me how hula hoop in exchange for acid. I took him up on it.
i wonder if cab drivers are trained in the art of delivering girls back to their dorms on Saturday mornings. because mine was so nice that he dropped me off at the back of my building so no one would see me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
But seriously who drew a dick on a tortilla and nailed it to the door?
No worries I have vodka. Its always on time
We told you to act sober so to prepare yourself you started doing squats and stretching then you slapped yourself and walked in
I don't know if the puke on my pants is mine or not
You don't come back from leaving a bag of shit on someone's counter Jill
if I start to respond to these political texts with a middle finger emoji - do you think they will get the hint?
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