i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
The pink midgets playing hockey is the EXACT reason cold meds and alcohol do not mix. Period.
It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
His dick might not be the answer to my problems, but I'm definitely ok with testing it as a possible solution.
All he said was "Yeah, there's a lot of air down there. And penis."
i drank out of my shoe...were you seriously expecting me to be the voice of reason?
In an m&m suit playing manhunt drunk. And you thought you werent guna have a good time
maybe you should do the old hyperventilate, take a shot of vodka, sniff someone's hair trick
So much beer in the passenger seat the seatbelt light is blinking
I went to the obgyn with chipped nail polish.. Somewhere Beyonce was looking down, shaking her head, whispering "Not fierce."
Whore are you.
Is that a Yoda insult or are you asking me where I am?
Yes.
My day in three words: secret purse cake
I only had ten dollars. So leave it to Katie to somehow makeout with the bartender, on his shift mind you, and get free drinks.
The difference in our lives is summed up perfectly in that you woke up next to a 6'4" guy with an accent and I woke up next to an unwrapped piece of string cheese.
Well my parents know I get medical Cannabis they saw me on the news at the dispensary
Randomize
