I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
What you up to?
Having coffee. Getting eyefucked. Eyefucking.
Full throttle
Some guys are relationship guys. Not our niche.
He just asked me to come into his empty apartment after he called his parents to make sure they wouldn't come home while I was there. This is starting to look like a bad rape scene from one of those made-for-TV Lifetime movies.
Heads up. We filled your kiddie pool with kool-aid and vodka. Things are about to get Out. Of. Hand. Quickly.
One minute we were getting noise complainted by the security guards the next I was shotgunning a beer with them
Well the police had to intervene and I couldn't exactly feel my legs by the end of the night, but I'd say it was a successful Friday night.
Yeah, you're right, it's a conspiracy against you. This small tight knit group of people who don't like assholes.
Why am I wearing a dog collar
Only way we could keep you from running in to traffic.
Because it's not worth it. And there is no nice way of saying "sorry, you're not good enough at sex for me to drive 45 mins"
She rode my dick so hard I momentarily lost hearing. I guarantee I had the better St Patrick's.
She asked how comfortable I was with her while we were in the shower. She then proceeded to pee in said shower.
Family trip though. I generally don't wheel too much ass with the fam in tow. Despite the fact my parents would be pleased if I did.
That's actually very serious....I really do think of you whenever is see pizza
The only thing i ask you for is vegan food and sex.
She is either doing really drawn out crunches or trying to sniff her boobs...She's lying on her back with her hand behind her head, forcing her head into the cleavage that's ok to expose and then moves her head back and then does it again.
Randomize
