were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
I bought the tickets, he brought the weed. thanks to you, we had to roll a joint out of my bible paper.
You know those ponds where you go and pay $5 and your guarranteed to catch a fish thats how i describe her
I'm pretty sure God is rooting for me with this two gf thing
What color are my eyes?
Ummmm... 34 C?
I'm really good at handling things like foreskin and speech impediments.
Stories of my weekends have cause divorces, are you sure you wanna hang out?
You were being mean. And telling everyone to suck your six inch strap on. People were not pleased
Please be lying.
Im not. Your family was creeped out
Literally if she wants to make a big deal, I'd rather have shit smeared on my face.
i thought you were just a really comfy body pillow until i sobered up. oops.
I'll just give him your contact info, and you'll somehow manage to get laid. Which will make me feel like your vagina's agent or something.
you bet i'm gonna rock his four-foot-two world.
He lured me round with the prospect of sex and then made me proofread his CV and spoon. I fucking hate this guy.
I just named someones junk. I should not be allowed to talk to people.
I woke up in a boat, with a life jacket on, tons of beer cans and no lake... I was inside a garage. WTF
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