Well the candle wax mightve been sexy if he didn't drop the candle and light half my bed on fire
Which one of you FUCKERS filled the toilet with soil and planted my mothers daisys in it? NOT FUCKING HAPPY
Yeah. Fortunately, the road to Hell is paved with naked 21 year old girls.
Which beats the fuck out of good intentions.
Do you ever wonder how many people have prayed for you to be a better person?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The girl who overdosed in the bathroom at work is back....help?
Weekend has begun hello red wine at 10am on a Wednesday
I have now added draft and wells specials that different bars have to my blackberry calendar.. Help me.
She came to class yesterday wearing a shirt saying Maybe Partying Will Help. Showed up to class today and puked three times.
I left for five minutes and Chris wound up half in women's clothes, half naked. And the naked half was covered in shamrock stickers.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Duuuuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fruuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fuuuck
Right now I'm drinking out of a gallon water jug & eating a baconator. If you're feeling down, just remember you could be me.
I feel like David Hasselhoff when he's drunk eating that cheeseburger and crying. But with cheesecake.
We just fucked each other sober. #goteam
are you watching the world series?
I've made out with alex bregman... so yes
That's the 3rd negative pregnancy test this month. I'm on a roll.
Randomize