I think I left something in your back seat.... It was my integrity
What wine goes with Cap'n Crunch?
Let me guess--your parents are cousins.
Why do I have flashes of a dark shed in my memory?
Because we had sex in one.
Sex with him was like teaching a two year old how to work a machine gun
you were sat in the corner crying until someone gave you a baguette, which you then tried to feed to the duck doorstop.
I regret nothing
how was it?
he was petting the bushes because they were "napkins"
I am in my freshman residence hall trying to convince an Asian man to give me my pants back. Never. Drinking. Again.
what the hell is that chicken wire thing she's holding?
An artistic expression of her stupidity.
Tried to shave my legs but the rug burn on my knees from last night got in the way.
I don't think I used nearly enough fucks in my reply to convey the level of fuck him.
and then after the older sorority girl asked me his name she said "he gave me the rest of his mcdonalds and I decided to go home with him. it was the best that I could hope for my night"
I have photo proof.
Girl, don't care. What's my rule? If I don't remember it, it never happened.
I used my mad pharmacist skills to turn ordinary birth control into morning after. I think my professors would be proud.
A massage should never include spaghetti sauce. shit was fucked up
Randomize
