you definitely held a convo with a hobo
we have a secret handshake
Idk if this white stuff in my shower is conditioner or... something else?
I forgot how ruthlessly advertising works on me when I'm high.
I dont think yelling "Grab your dicks, time for pics!" helped your case either.
I got Green Bay stickers to put on my nipples. This way when I flash it will look like I did it out of spirit as opposed to drunkenness
Is it love? I honestly haven't even thought about watching porn for over a week now, and haven't thought about fucking any strangers either. It's quite eerie.
You guys can't keep having sex with them and cleaning their house! They're never going to take you seriously!
his butt looks cute in my panties so i decided he has to wear panties all the time from now on.
I'm watching the Brazzers version of Mary Poppins and enjoying it. Volume on and all. 45 minutes.
He was leaving the restaurant I was going to as I was parking. I didn't want to scream, "hey, didn't I jerk you off?" Out of my window at 10 am
Fuck you. Leave my nipples out of this. THEY DID NOTHING TO YOU
The language barrier was annoying .... So we just had sex. That is how you deal with not being able to chat isn't it???
he was wearing a widestriped red gingham suit jacket with complete sincerity im not surprised she beat the shit out of him
I just want to say that I've always loved you and you are my best friend ever
You gave that creepy guy my number, didn't you? You really need to learn how to just say no, not interested.
So what your saying is you dont remember trying to hit a golf ball off my chest with a 9 iron?
Randomize
