Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
As my groomsman, I expect you to learn the Thriller dance with me before next September.
We just had the worst moment of our late twenties.... We just realized we are too old for the real world
I am laying on the kitchen floor eating cold chicken fingers and drinking wine. welcome to my new years party.
i'm sitting in the library realizing that the 2 most productive things i did this weekend was have sex and go to the liquor store...
He said he had to make up a lie of why he couldnt sleep with her. It must really suck to have a sunburned dick.
Well, at first I was really confused. But then I realized that he was talking from his penis's perspective... in third person.
I wanna thank you for having such slutty friends growing up. Your a great little sister
Her exstacy made her nickname everyone David. Nobody knows who the fuck she's talking to so we just say no to everything she says. She's crying.
You just kept yelling, "THAT'S THE POWER OF PINESOL, BABY!"
We're about to have a bottle rocket fight on jetskis. You have 5 minutes to get on our level.
I just don't do feelings in the summer months.
My usual answer of have sex with it doesn't work in this situation
Happy 4th. Did you guys get your syphilis thing taken care of?
My roommate randomally bought me two bags of pretzels. Worst "Sorry you can hear me fucking my boyfriend everynight" gift ever.
Randomize
