Things I find upon waking: a gay man, a straight girl both clad in web bathing suits, a full bathtub, an empyt bottle of jamesons at the bottom and a scuba mask
I mixed the ketchup wit the mustard in one bottle to save time making hotdogs
just found his boxers balled up inside my tights, hidden in my freezer. damn i love college.
you woulda been proud of me tonight though. i only made out with 2 guys. and in my defense one of them was to get a job after graduation.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
no i had to finish in the bathroom to a pic of her mom in a bikini.
This is all my moms fault. She shouldn't have encouraged my weird fascinations as a child
She was shaking her boobs and I was so high all I could think was "breast maracas"
Come part with me. By you sleep! No fun. Idek feelings Sorry for your life.
Bake him heart shaped cookies?!? Send him a picture of your tits like an ADULT!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Fuck. I have to get my shit together by lunch. Mission impossible.
I hooked up with a guy that had a beard last night felt like I was building a fucken log cabin
Well I'm in a stranger's bed.
Gotta leave to watch the Lions
I'm wine drunk & this is not good news for anybody
Dude you literally tried to cook your phone in the microwave. You were so wasted you asked your mom to help you turn it on.
My vagina! What have you done to it?
Blessed it my child.
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