Listen the way I know if I'm drunk is if I have stage fright in the pisser if I do then I'm not drunk! And I definitely still do right now!
I just got a facebook invite to join a group called "bring back the old franzia spout." i never want our generation to grow up.
I just peed next to my dog in the yard. Unparalleled forms of bonding going on over here.
I walked in and she was kneeling on the ground with no pants on, throwing up, and holding the puppy. It was one of those moments, where i was like damn i wish i had my camera.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Like lay upon bear skin rugs, drink brandy and reminisce of the yesteryear's before a majestic fire place? Because those are my plans.
He and I are basically the same person, except he has a glorious penis and I have glorious breasts.
I just took my birth control with Redi-Whip. I'm that girl.
We fucked to the rythmn of the thunder, it was magical
Whats proper etiquette for apologizing to your wife for being so drunk you stood up and pissed on the bedroom floor next to the bed?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you did that thing you do when youre drunk where you rant about bruce springsteen, start hooking up with someone and then pass out midway through
She has this wild look other eyes like she wouldn't be afraid to commit a felony.
We are so drunk half our team had to bowl with a chaperone. We won every game. We drink
Glow Paint looked great for the Black Light Party last night, Tonight having a glow in the dark Pizza on my arm, not so much.
sarahs drunk and is drawing dinosaurs all over the apartment. should i stop her?
whats she drawing them with?
eyeliner
no that's ok
just saw a kid waiting at the door of the stairs for the elevator. there is no elevator in this building. get on his level.
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