WHO ATE OUR COOKIES WHAT THE FUCK THOSE WERE GOURMET
Do you know how easy it would be to shoplift if I was a magician?!
I just got a drinking merit badge from a slutty girl scout
I have a new fascination with cutting really small segments of hair off peoples heads when they're not looking.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
By the way, her vagina was so tight i was worried that i would be stuck forever
look out your window.... he's holding his iphone up like a boombox playing you beach boys
man, work is way more interesting with these acid flashbacks.
Codeine + Boredom = Sprinting between my front and back door.
Guess who just got a Christian Beliefs class to seriously discuss the spiritual implications of dolphin rape?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
SMOKEY THE BEAR CAME AT US WITH FUCKING AXES IN MY DREAM I THINK IT IS A SIGN TO STOP BLAZING IT IN THE WOODS
Ended up at the strip club, got told I should be a dancer 4 times, got free tacos and my hot TA slide in the dms. How was your night?
I fucked her with a giant balloon tied to my dick. You tell ME how my night went
So I decided to sleep with him for the first time in months so I can convince him it's his kid instead of the other guy
I was running because his wife invited me to join them on their kinky Vegas weekend. Crossing state lines is too much commitment for me.
Anyway, that's been my evening- crying and looking up diabetes symptoms. How was your night?
Randomize