do you want me to make hamburgers?
i'm vegan
i'll put lettuce on them
At least my shower head will respect me in the morning.
at least 'blackout me' had enough sense to take the puke covered duvet off the comforter.
he has officially spend more money on me than any other boy. and its all gone to plan b. awesome.
He is going overseas for 8 months, not only was that blowjob a going away present, but i was supporting the troops
I just want you to know IcyHot in the ear is weird. Don't ask.
Just looked in the mirror and i look like ive been gang banged. Im so proud of my boyfriend it almost hurts
then he tried to tell me how many times he had seen Scott's dick. his estimate was about 180 times. he thought I didn't understand.
We were having sex and his high flatmates stood outside his room playing the guitar and singing Somebody to Love by Justin Beiber. Weirdest night ever.
Nick is about to bring home a woman who is 39, a mother, and, by all accounts, FUCKING HOMELESS. Will update as details become available.
He just stays over and makes naked pancakes in the morning
Teach me the ways of your demonic sorcery.
It's three am. I'm drunk in a stairwell in Vegas. My flight leaves at six. Help.
If it makes you feel any better, I can't find the goldfish I dropped like five minutes ago.
Panties = found
Randomize
