it seems that i get a boner from just about everything now
she pooed on me. she actually pooed on me.
first time Ive ever had to stop sex to go pass out in the kitchen floor...
Just think, if your stepsister would've gotten knocked up 2 years earlier, she could've had a TV show. What a bitch.
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I don't know why I've never thought to take my bong into the bathtub before.
Made a salesman quit his job, a saleswoman cry, and got a manager to half shout "fuck this"....successful drunk Christmas shopping
Honestly, It follows the same rules as Cock Roulette.
sold 4 oz of weed today pantsless. man i love college.
He needs to respect me before he can fuck me with cat ears on.
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No, this place just freaks me out. Like I feel like ill get pregnant just being here. And all those pregnant bellies. It's weird.
Basically, I'm sure one day I'll look back on this part of my life and be ashamed....
The worst part was when I went to go spit it out and rinse my mouth, his grandpa was in the bathroom, so I had to fucking wait. It was awful. I finally ran to the kitchen and prayed his parents didn't come out of their room.
Nothing says depression like laying in your bed stoned, naked, and eating a cupcake
Swear to god, somebody just drove by with mickey mouse in their passenger seat and he waved at me.
And ANOTHER guy that I once got naked is doing gay porn now. Wtf? Am I the audition?!
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