is it bad that i kinda- ok, reallyyy don't remember having sex with him last night?
It's impossible to flirt with the bank tellers because they see how broke I am.
There are bud lights poping out of the zipper of my overnight bag and my dildo almost fell out in the elevator. not professional
Making a drinking game out of jeopardy does not mean you studied..
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
I hope after we constantly bang for 2 days straight we can agree to be friends again
I still have way too many Frat houses to get blackout drunk at before I'm get in any type of relationship
The random guy I fucked from craigslist said I had the best smile. I take compliments where i can get them
One of the guys I danced with wanted to give me his number so I convinced him I had a photographic memory and that I would remember it.
Im having a st. Get way fucked till i speak Irish pre game party. Bring a compass cause we are about to get lost
It was the needle in the haystack of teary, unpleasant handjobs.
We do have a rich storied history of emotional warfare
Amazon is not showing any promising results for penis tree toppers and I am genuinely surprised. Clearly this is a market that needs to be addressed.
So Saturday night after 10 drinks I guess he tried to have sex with me and in the middle of it I asked "can you tell I'm faking it!?" and then I sat up and threw up in my hand. That's a sex Win in my books
Who is this? I have a text from you last night telling me your name and to train hard for Tuesday, please make this make sense
Randomize
