we were frolicking through a fountain of pizza rolls. it was like the best dream i ever had
May or may not have just drunkenly opened my christmas presents. Greatly disappointed. Might break up sooner.
it will be a sad day when drinking racks of keystone isnt socially acceptable anymore
hammered. By myself. Accident. Faillll. Snowwwwwy
Well I woke up with a note on me reading Dear Passed Out Girl, and ending with why I shouldn't drink so much. Damn Tequilla.
i woke up in his bed to a "teach your baby to read" infomercial. i pray to GOD that's not a sign
i guess when we were done i grunted "unforgiveable" and walked out.
Idk. I woke up marinating in beer on my beanbag. Idk what you mightve done.
I'm so confused. I feel like I just intentionally took roofies to see where I'd end up.
Sunday is the day of rest.
As in, whatever liquor is left after last night, you have to drink the rest.
we def had a heart to heart that turned into a BJ last night
I couldn't do it. You can't break up after that many orgasms. It's physically impossible.
I was sleeping pretty good until your cat pooped loudly. I dreamed that a full grown man was pooping on my ear. It startled me.
By NOT going to the gym, I'm helping my future. I don't want stripping, prostitution, or porn to be viable money making options.
Please tell me that nice older woman you're with at the bar is not your comp&lit professor.
Randomize