Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
My brother just put in eyedrops to talk to my mom on the phone
I used the lotion his mom gave me for christmas to give him a hand job. It felt so wrong.
I vaguely remember walking down the highstreet with a plate of K offering lines to passers buy. I sold a line to a taxi driver.
oh, i've got big weekend plans. on an unrelated note, do you think viagra will work if the guy is roofied?
You just sat there and yelled "I JUST WANT TO RUB MY NIPPLES"
She has a tattoo on her inner thigh that's an x with a long dotted line. So after she passed out I signed it. Dunno what else I was supposed to do...
He never broke character while fucking me on the neighbor's lawn. I give him a 10 for his dedication to the British accent.
The shit I just took was four, very distinct colors. Jager night was a success
Made eye contact with a friendly neighborhood dog walker while violently puking out the window. How's your Wednesday going?
Got home to the hotel 3hrs ago per texts sent not in english to not a full phone number
Get up, biotch, before I come traipsing in there to rip apart whatever god-forsaken spoon you have going on between the two of you and your dog.
You're only young once, and once you get old, you either regret all the sex you had, or you regret not having enough.
TFW YOU ACCIDENTALLY SEND A MEME ABOUT LIKING ANAL TO THE GROUP CHAT. JESUS FUCKING CHRIST, WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME?
It was great. Except he kept asking me to lick his butthole, I was like firm no
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