my penis was classy and tasteful, i don't know what her problem was.
omg! a creepy truck driver just made a frog puppet wave at me!!!
my hot student got the clitoris wrong on the lab practical...so it kinda makes me not want to pursue it
just because he can't find it on a cat, doesn't mean he can't find it on you
She just got in car wreck. Wreck sex is better than break up sex
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
nothing worse than sitting down ready for a solid porn sesh to find out your internet is out. comcast owes me a handjob
I really need to find a new way to reward you other than head scratches, nutella and blowjobs.
He makes me want to shower. It must be love.
How can I explain how nice he is to you? ...like, I'm going to have to have my world famous why being a douche is sexy talk.
im not sure what exactly happened but i may need help faking my own death
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She took the fish and put it in the hot tub, then turned on the jets. She said she was training it for the Olympics.
Have you ever just woke up in the morning and felt pregnant
I don't know what else is in your wedding gift, but I just pulled out a pair of handcuffs in front of her grandmother.
Also a whip and a blindfold. Don't be a bitch, enjoy it!
She grinded so hard on my face that I've got rugburn on both eyelids
I KEEP THINKING INAPPROPRIATE SEXUAL THOUGHTS ABOUT YOU AND I AM SORRY.
I feel like you should store your weed in something that suits your personality. For example mines in a hollowed out disney princess book.
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