I have said "that's the wrong hole" for the last time.
totally poinked my lawyers daughter in his hot tub last night. i figure getting off is just compensation for not getting me off.
Just ran into my ex in the WOMENS bathroom. He said I did this to him. Swore he never wore my clothes but said he liked my skirt. I need vodka.
Now for something completely different: ive figured out how to eat a banana without insinuating something completely naughty
I've hooked up with six guys in my ethics class next semester...I feel like I've failed already
Thank God I did Vegas bombs with those cops at their Christmas party. We should so be in jail.
Chugged a beer while being walked to the bathroom by campus police to pour the beers out.
No, this is a senior booty call. It cannot be ignored.
He wants to hookup..at the fair..this is our chance to leave him stranded with no clothes.
Question: trumpet bong. Can it work.
I swear if he puts my hand anywhere near his dick tonight I'm "accidentally" leaving all my rings on
My VP dropped me off at the Strip Club in Houston. Just said "I was never here".
Jk probs not coming. Tequila
I am no longer embarassed by my vagina
It concerns why you would be in the first place, but I'd rather not know
We free pour in this house. Measuring alcohol is for the weak
Randomize
