its like randi wears special contacts, but instead of colors they make her eyes say "I want cock"
If I'm having a dream where I'm having sex and I can actually feel it between my legs because I've had a lot of it recently, does that make me a whore?
I have a feeling this is a serious question. Problem solve, Jess.. I'm going to let you figure that one out on your own
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
seeing an 80 year old woman puke in the bushes changes everything...
that's spring break in florida for ya
The guy in the cast riped the tap off the keg and hit steve with it
please visit steve this weekend, he is getting mature and responsible and shit which scares me.
Pretty sure I can show you the text you sent me stating some interest in my penis entering your mouth if said circumstances were met.
oh my god, just saw a man throw up in a trashcan and blood came out of his nose. HES GETTING ON MY BUS. HES SITTING ACROSS FROM ME. FUCK.
I know. I told you I'm a mess. She had weird nipples. I almost lost an eye to one.
I have got to stop letting people hang ornaments from my nipple ring.
Tis the season.
struggle bus is officially taking me on a road trip to hell. If this is just the first destination, I'll jump out the fucking window.
It's a little weird that I'm blowing my wingman.
My little brother came home while I was sitting there icing my vagina with a bag of peas. Asshole looks at me, high fives Ryan, then leaves.
Dentist appt at 2pm get milk poured on my tits by 2am
A marvelous 12 hours
Stopping for a booty call on the way to a lunch date... Bad form?
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