I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
So you started off by saying "no homo," but patting his crotch and saying his jeans fit him wonderfully may have overshadowed that.
You going to midnight mass? we need a dd
He said he had to make up a lie of why he couldnt sleep with her. It must really suck to have a sunburned dick.
Remember the girl passed out in front of my fireplace?
Is it uncouth to have a themed intervention? I know how much you like Star Wars.
Disregard the shoes in the freezer.
I had to find out that I peed in the box of baby clothes from my mom, who found out from my grandma. New low.
It was like inception, a dream, in a dream, in the back of a dodge charger.
Good. We don't answer calls at dick thirty.
I feel like everyone in class can tell we had a threesome last weekend.
What!? It's 7:30am on gameday. This keg is not going to drink itself.
If I had 3 wishes one would for sure be a designated driver for life that gives hand jobs.
4 out of 7 roommates in one month isn't that bad if you think about the fact that 3 of them were in the last 24 hours
Dropped the bowl in the litter box. But it landed face up. What do I do?
Randomize
