I just had sex in the back of an ambulance. Call me.
BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
filled out health questionnaire for lower premiums a little bit too honestly. Literally got assigned a life coach.
Superbowl and Mardi Gras a week apart. World's longest bender here I come.
No I'm not coming over. That Bob Ross drinking game is too intense.
My relaxing drive may end up as a surprise bootycall in Pittsburgh. Don't try to stop me.
PRINCE HARRY WAS AT WAL MART SO NEXT TIME YOU BITCH ABOUT GOING TO WAL MART REMEMBER THAT EVEN PRINCE HARRY GOES TO WAL MART.
By getting lucky do you mean I get one of your incredible BJs or you not killing me by the end of dinner?
Want to know what makes for a better story than treehouse sex? Getting busted during treehouse sex
I'm confident that their children would come out as 100% authentic rats
haha it's ok, I asked people. I was like "I'm high and lost" and the dude just said "That's my life. Love it."
I told my mom I'm great in bed. That is quality mother daughter bonding.
He just asked me to be his girlfriend while having sex on his parents kitchen counter
She'll feel so accomplished if she finally gets to bang me.
I bought a box of wine on my way home. I figured if I’m going to be broke during the holidays, I might as well be able to drink about it.
Randomize
