he was sobbing,drinking his beer, all while confessing his love for her. awkward was an understatement...
For future reference, a lint roller appears to be the easiest way to get glitter out of a beard.
This girl can open a bottle without using her hands and she's 21. She meets my standards
He just made me apologize because his morning wood is NOT a laughing matter.
She wants an explanation of my cousins creepy foot fetish with my god sister. i don't know how I can sum this up in a text.
She brought a box of chocolates to give the bartender and now he's giving her free shots.. Why didn't we think of that?
Snuck into a camper in someone's yard. Hotboxing. Can't wait until they go in it.
Theres a guy in your room wearing a franzi box costume and some girl is in the box giving him head.
First of all you can never say anal too much. Second I now think you're a total gentleman.
Rarely has that paragraph ever been put together
You shall now refer to my vagina as patty and patty only
We drank vodka and koolaid through a traffic cone. It got rowdy.
Underoos and an IDGAF attitude: all you need to successfully win at life
(Underoos optional)
He's gone. He left a note but all it says is "Dear Neil" followed by a drawing of a hand flipping the bird in the direction of a butt.
He bedazzled a shirt for me that said "best head giver" should I be thankful for the gift or concerned that he has a bedazzler?
Soooo you're telling me you support us groom's men giving lap dances to willing patrons?
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