Well apparently he's into motor boating.
Google if cops ever smoke weeds and then bust them. I need to know immidiately.
dude, seriously he just sucked the milk out of the dogs breast and swallowed it... for $20, wtf....?
Yeah but I get laid and I know. He drank toilet water last night and he doesn't know about that either. Still makes me happy though.
I told him he deserved someone better...then I told him he looked very fuck-able wearing nothing but sweat pants. We'll break up in the morning.
Tell him to dress up like Shaggy and kidnap him then bring him to me. We can pretend. Imaagination.
I'm not sure what is worse, the fact that Hoffman doesn't sell vodka before 9am or that I was trying to buy vodka at 8:30am.
It makes showers more interesting trying to drink a gin and tonic and keep soap out of my eyes at the same time.
You need to calm down.
Well we had to pull over on a side street in town so I could throw up while moms were driving by with car loads of kids, I feel like I just performed a lil silent AA film for the childrens
I know he's gay. But if he touches my vagina I'm human centipeding his face. Sorry not sorry
Sometimes I refuse to go through a door until someone holds it open for me because I'm a fucking lady.
Sex to movie scores is my best choice of the year. You've had an orgasm but have you had an orgasm with an entire orchestra.
Reading becomes significantly more difficult when people are having crazy loud sex in an adjoining room
That man fucks like a champ. The sex was so good I did him again in the morning just to be sure
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
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