K got coke dick during a threesome with two strippers. Say no to drugs.
69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
i have the juiciest gold medal in my pants
I wish i could convert my hornyness to productiveness. I would have written a fucking book by now.
He must hate going to the bathroom. Every time he does he is reminded how small his dick is.
im not an educated person. i just do things. and it works out in my favor
Found out my brother is now my eskimo brother...One of my proudest times as a brother
Didn't get to fuck her. Had to leave abruptly through window. Explain later.
You called me at 2am singing 'happy birthday' while screaming 'I fucking love you' verses, all while eating a burrito and taking a piss off your apartment balcony
Yeah I know, the people below me already told me
You are NEVER going to guess whose penis was JUST in my mouth!!!
I'll give you a hint, we ate paste with him in kindergarten.
He smells so good today
Seriously, back away from the sexual harrasment suit.
last night we stole an a/c window unit from a frat. gonna be a great summer
it's taken me 3 hours to eat this pudding cup. I think I am melting.
Last night dinner was cinnamon buns and whiskey. At least tonight I had a fajita with my cookies and tequila. I may be a little stressed about these end of semester tests.
How early is too early to start day drinking? Asking for a friend
About five minutes ago. You’re good now.
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