Sitting in class thinking wow im glad im not hungover...and then i realized im still drunk.
I havent dry-humped that much since freshmen year. Forgot how good it doesnt feel.
if by 'bottleservice' you mean 'bringing beers in my purse' then yes, we are.
I didn't mind getting the stomach flu from him. we had great sex AND I'm seven pounds lighter
Is she bent over a couch yet or did daylight savings time throw off her usual schedule?
No she had like 2 shots and started ironing her clothes and whispering random shit in my ear
I really hope the fuck ferry pays me a visit to close out 2011 properly.
I just showered sitting down with a sippy cup of water in there with me. It took 40 minutes. That hungover.
the last thing i remember was the norwegian kid tacking a bag of wine to the ceiling, then boom! shower drain.
Sometimes I actually rage on Tuesday, come back, and do homework drunk and pull an all nighter.
I never thought I could be this turned on by a man wearing racoon tails.
So glad I can hide money in my wallet and drunk me is too stupid to find it. Hangover sushi ftw.
Did I see you at the bar last night?
Yes. You just kept grabbing my boobs and saying how much better they are than yours...
I'm at her wedding and she managed to get every single one night stand I ever had in her wedding party. Why does she hate me?
Dude, I need a fuckin wingman and this could finally make us eskimo brothers, how can you pass that up?
Randomize
