oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
it was like she wanted to be a once a week night stand
I'm sitting here watching a kid lick a basketball- where have i gone wrong in life?
So thats when I found out ur supposed to put the penut butter on your balls not your dogs balls, feels alot better
I just went to a subway where the girl didn't know how to make a blt. I will not miss public school texans.
They found an open window, climbed through and proceeded to arrest half the party. These campus cops are like fucking ninjas.
nothing like walking down the street with a garbage bag of puke trying to find a dumpster
I think she faked a seizure to get out of it ...
I have a new philosophy. Fuck wearing bras, it's summertime.
Oh no, we smoked the revival weed. It came in a Batman bag. It hit like justice. And orphans.
If I get there and all he has for my big valentines surprise is his body, I'm dumping his ass and posting his dirty pictures on a porn site so people can laugh at him.
all I remember is grinding on everyone in the room regardless of gender and quoting the lion king non-stop. We need to stop buying Jameson.
Howd it go?
Well we had the "no we're not fucking on the porch" conversation but then we totally fucked on the porch. So I'd say alright.
Bro, that'd be the third dick I've taken down in the office.
He wants to play improv games now whenever he gets drunk. Sometimes I just do not have the energy for that kind of a thing
Randomize
