I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
he said 'i want to be the peanut butter to your jelly, just without the crust' and then tried to take me shirt off
she handed me her phone while she blew me and told me to text her bf that she was at the store
Today in psych we learned that you are a whore.
Me specifically?
Yep.
Dude, the women on the view have some valid arguments
You know how I know you're gay?
i was about to cum until he started doing shrek impressions.
all i remember is screaming butter knifes are for pussies.
when i spit it made a heart shape. i think it's a sign
You should get a handy in the street again, just to prove you've still got it.
I was tackling you out of excitement
Yeah thank goodness the stripper pole was there to break my fall.
IT IS EARTH DAY, RECORD STORE DAY, 4/20 EVE, AND SATURDAY ALL AT THE SAME TIME!
The tit pic search didn't go as planned, some old guy sent me a pic of his balls and said stop texting his daughter. Better luck tomorrow
Hey, you know that marble art statue thing in your bedroom? Hypothetically what would happen if a penis got stuck in it?
I think I kinda scared him when I tried to wrap his snake around his dick while he was trying to nap.
just threw up in a gas staton parking lot in front of a father and son. stared them in the eyes and finished like a boss
Randomize
