you know what its like when everyone is chanting "do it, do it"...still friends?
I'm going to start telling people I'm a sophomore so they stop asking me about college and what I want to do with my life
And all I wanted you to do is stand there and sing who let the dogs out.
It's not slutty if it's for workout purposes...right?
I'm high and dancing to practical magic. Your needs for my penis can wait.
The best part of the night was you shouting "I have to take the LSAT tomorrow" between shots of fireball.
YOU HAVE PISSED AND FUCKED ON LITERALLY EVERYTHING IN MY HOUSE
Not everything, just a few things. And only a few times. The odds are really not all that bad when you break it down.
you’ve pissed every time you slept over. there’s no such thing as odds anymore. it’s guaranteed
I'm about to eat a 2month old weed brownie I just found in my lax duffel bag. will you answer if I call you in like an hour and a half
That cat I follow on Facebook beat cancer so we're drinking tonight in celebration
Now all I have unanswered questions and a fucked up finger
like, there should be nothing wrong with me wanting to watch you put on a bikini and roll around in a kiddie pool of jello
If ur gunna go fuck a guy that's in the baseball hall of fame do you need to shave your legs? I'm so lazy
When I went to pick up Adam from the train station, I found him passed out, covered in gold paint and wrapped in a red blanket. someone had glued a gaudy green rhinestone to his forehead. He looked homeless.
Just opened my sisters laptop to "cute places to lose my virginity" googled last
I’m not washing my pussy with handsoap.
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