I will not ride trays down a flight of stairs topless and drunk....
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
And then out of the blue she sent me a youtube video mashup of cats puking to techno music
My google searches from last night: tetanus shot rabbit bite, Bacardi gluten free
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We are hot boxing the gondola
I hate everything.
crossing my fingers that hitting golf balls off my pourch was a dream and not something that actaculy happened
I had so much drainage I couldn't moan properly. Fuck allergy season
The creepiest man is serenading me at the bar right now. I had about a quarter of a drink left and the bartender just walked over and filled it with vodka and walked away laughing.
Nothing better then waking up to multiple snap stories of people doing body shots of tequlia off of you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Checking out a dudes' nachos instead of the dude #foreveralone
Literally had sex in his grow room under a plant.. ganja queen .
He's got a british accent, a tounge ring, and he's wearing an eye patch... Of corse I'm fucking him
You kept telling everyone that you were as sober as a camel. I have yet to figure out what that means
They made the paper for stealing gnomes. I fucked a local celebrity.
You kept on yelling traitor and threatened to kill him and everyone he loves because he played beerpong with someone else
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