I just fucked a rockette. This would have been amazing a week ago.
my advisor is telling us the best way to sneak in alcohol on move in day. I definately picked the right college
They found a chair, duct taped me to it, then gave me a bottle of vodka to 'make me feel at home'
he walkred up to the manager at dennys and said 'look, my friends passed out in your bathroom, can i go get her?'
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You guys don't happened to be dressed as gladiators, do you?
Toilet is so comfy. Serious question/why does weed make every surface feel like bed?
you riverdanced for the cops while the rest ran away.
Nothing is worse than post drunken playoff baseball loss sex
Apparently I stole windex from the cab driver. Klepto Tom strikes again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have a boner in one of my pics with her which no one noticed.
Part of my tooth flew in my eye when the dentist was drilling my cavity then I was sent to the ER. Fucking never going back
Idk you're asking me for advice on dating bro, after I told you I got a convicts number today.
I haven't heard from him yet. He's either still asleep (which is entirely plausible..... There wasn't much sleeping happening last night) or he's robbing me blind. But I have renters insurance, so either way, I'm ok with it.
WHY DID I MAKE A 7 minute video of me eating crackers and cheese when I was high
Send it to me
That chick keeps sending eggplant emojis
Welcome to dating in the digital age. Better catch up now that you’re divorced
and eggplant is code for penis. It means she’s DTF. Go get her tiger!!!
Randomize