her bridesmaids come in huge, huger, wtf, and free willy. all their gown are strapless. its like watching the Hindenburg waddle down the isle.
I feel like I should limit myself to one meal prepared from a box per day
i've never been that scared in my life. i ran naked into the corner and he just stood there trying to shield his boner from the light.
Lead with your genitals is the best advice I can give you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Your cock deserves a montage
And fyi howling is not an acceptable form of communication.
Next time we smoke don't let me talk. I just said something and it sounded like I was speaking in hashtag.
I'll get you through man, I'll be your fairy godmother with better prescription drugs
Boys should be on-demand - like, once you select one, he's yours for the next 24-hours
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
didn't prepare for this snow storm at all. i only have like 6 beer and all my booty calls already went home for the holiday. this is bull.
Sorry for all the snapchats, I wanted you to feel like u were in America getting plastered with me
You called it motorboating but you just snot rocketed into my tits.
It's Christmas. You could splurge on something a LITTLE fancier than wine in a box.
Nothing says responsible like taking your birth control with an open bottle of wine you left on your night stand from the night before
I moved to this city Tuesday and got laid Saturday. Still got it.
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