It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
At Wal-Mart last night I watched two guys scramble for $4.34 to pay for a pack of ping pong balls and red solo cups. They had to put the .34 on a credit card. Winter break begins!
Took his v-card last night. Yet another experience I didn't expect to have in my thirties.
How would one go about tricking someone into chugging an entire bottle of tequila?
well.. I tried flushing my sandals down the toilet
So the bartender from Applebees totally looks like he would take his clothes off for $40
I like how you possess the gift that turns normal guys into strippers
She's wearing her dead grandmother's pearl on the married finger so no guys "bother her" tonight... I am not THAT committed to Girl's Night.
Thanks for letting me rent out your vagina rec room. I don't expect the security deposit back.
I just watched our fat male neighbor dibble a soccer ball across the lawn. It looked like Baywatch with diabetes
I do believe that seeing camel toe in leopard print pants at Walmart is the closest I will ever come to going on a safari
You had me on my knees catching cheese balls in my mouth and moaning. In front of all your friends.
She's passed out with a slice of pizza between her boobs should I just eat it and leave
Google Maps needs to have a hungover setting. That bitch talks too loud and all I want is breakfast tacos & a bloody fucking mary.
Stop leaving buckets of wine at my house.
WHY DON'T YOU WANT TO BE MY ESKIMO BRO
Randomize
