somehow, due in part to drug cocktail and alchl prior to meeting, i blacked out, got home, made total mess of kitchen, broke shower, and made 17 hard boiled eggs
If you were a Panda and I were a Koala and we had a baby, it'd be a falafel. Just think about that.
): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
people are starting to question the shark bite story
I booked us a cruise for November. Lose 20 pounds and don't cheat on me before then.
i just remembered the time you guys tried to give me an intervention because i was drunk before 5 on a monday
I honestly didn't see the problem playing beer pong In the car on the road trip home.
I just watched a woman in a full wedding dress and veil walk out of the chinese buffet...I no longer believe I have a problem, and am afraid I am underdressed.
I'm currently sitting beside my brother who is taking a bath and feeding him nachos while he covers his genitals. If that's not sibling bonding then I don't know what is
You can't just say "I scored us a potential threesome" and then not text me back.
Damn Instagram explore page. I am six months in to some girl I don't even know.
Well, the night started out with you ALMOST falling out of a tree. Then we went back to the tree after about 9 shots and you DID fall out of the tree.
Went home last night with that hot British guy. Sounded like I was f-ing in a Harry Potter movie.
why the hell are you crying over taco bell?
Don't ask but i need a priest, a calzone, a litre of gravy, and exactly 7 oreos
And a bag of nachos
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