my mom asked me how i could steal on a clear conscious and i told her it was because when i was younger she let me watch alladin and he did it.
Do you have any cake mix? I kind of need to make a "im sorry i drank all your parents tequila, threw up all over your floor and slept with you boyfriend" cake.
Should I go home with him even though I know my Run DMC undies have skid marks on them?
Vanilla vodka + chocolate soymilk does NOT equal an epic milkshake.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Bad idea pregaming graduation.... she just threw up before walking across the stage... i'm gonna miss this
when she first told me she hooked up with him my initial response was to shout "WE HAVE SOMETHING IN COMMON!"
I gave you head at the stadium on a Thursday night ESPN game. That damn well better be worth points on the score board!!!
The only pictures I have are of me being stoned or me looking like a man, which do you prefer?
im in the library and there's this guy on a computer just staring at a google image of beer. finals week is rough.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now Heβs Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just when I thought he had turned a new leaf, I see a "Let me get you pregnant" shirt in his closet
nothing like having plan b for breakfast in a cvs parking lot before ordering this semester's textbooks
Is it possible to hurt your vagina working out, because I think my Dumbass accomplished that... π―πππ
Do I even want to know?
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
On a scale of 1 to hungover Iβm definitely throwing up at the office today.
A guy just threw up in my lecture of 500 ppl and just got up and walked away
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