i feel like i'm waiting in line to date brett michaels
If its called oral, why is it so hard to talk?
jungle juice + heels + stairs = broken arm
he has a knack for choosing the worst time to masturbate
Talking to a male stripper. About the LSAT. Only in Vegas.
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
She is screaming bc she thinks you jumped out the window...please show her you just went out for a smoke
Baked and hanging out with Al from Home Improvement's son. You can't make this shit up. Tuh-rippin balls
Your mom won me $100 and you showed me your tits. Solid evening.
I have accepted that I am a sexual predator. What I can't accept is the lack of sexual men for me to seduce in this town.
He's so twisted that he's acting out Dragon Ball-Z by himself. The Tanquray and THC combo doesn't play around.
Just remembered when I first started going down on him he goes "ok now I feel a little better about the broncos losing"
I feel like one thing if I have going for me is that my bed looks like a nice place to have sex
Just in case you blacked out, we had sex, you came in me, we need plan B, we fell off your top bunk, broke your roommates chair, i still like you, but i'm in pain and am going to bed
Unless it has to do with ramen, goldfish, cheese, or rugby, don't talk to me.
Randomize
