just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
if every girl in minneapolis isn't pregnant when i get back to the cities i will cry
He cummed in my mouth, then said he had to go because his best friend broke his foot falling off of a balcony, put twenty dollars in my hand and was gone before I could even swallow...
you're the only person I know who would bring a water bottle of screwdriver to a wedding, and toast with it during the speech
just gave another girl i passed on the walk of shame a high five
can't blv i tried using a "backpack" as a unit of measurement...i drank a lot of beer last night
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
You said you couldn't look at me because you would have to take off your sunglasses but you can't because they're the "guides to your eyes".
Is there a coat check? I stole 10 vases of flowers along with two bottles of champagne and I'm not sure what to do with them.
So... I woke up on a bench with a honey bun on my chest.
I'm so pissed theres no male strip clubs around where we are staying I looked extensively
I accidentally sent my mom a nude picture of my ass... she replied with how did you get that angle ?
wheres my face? and why is my pocket so big?
She really wants to hug you. With her vagina.
Dude my roommate just peed out the window
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