You don't understand, alcohol has become a thing of survival for me and without it I can't function as a normal human being
We just had the worst moment of our late twenties.... We just realized we are too old for the real world
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
four loko is apparently banned in the us. so i think its time for us to stock up. i already emailed them about buying them in bulk
i'm not sure when it happened but apparently now it's topless bar night, im wearing a leotard and everyone is looking at me like i'm cheating.
we convincced her parents we were only wasted meanwhile theire faces were morphing into one and i swear there was a reindeer in the background
I did the walk of shame wearing his scrubs. Fucking med school students is the way to go.
Stole a wheelchair from the hospital and rolled down the street smoking and drinking this is my weekend
The Supreme Court upheld health insurance. If that's not an excuse to get hospital drunk, I don't know what is.
he wouldn't lick chocolate syrup off of me because he's vegan. most awkward shower ever.
Things are coming back to me in chunks. I vaguely remember signing a shirt that said 'I enjoy vagina'
I AM SO PROUD OF YOU
He was feeling me up but acting like he was asleep. Like WTF does that mean??
A relationship is waiting for him to fall asleep so you can cum (finally!) while watching porn
I've realized that my life is a cycle of high that is only broken by sobering up at work, which only happens because I can't smoke more
Next time I say "i forgot to eat dinner, oh well" before drinking STRAP ME TO A CHAIR AND FORCE FEED ME BEFORE ALLOWING ME TO CONSUME BOOZE
Randomize
