Goodnight my chunky, little, marshmallow muncher
If my vagina had boots, it would be shaking in them.
he had more hair on his balls then in my Easter basket
I saw Winona at my church today. She has boobs, now.
Miracles do happen.
Are you asking me on a date where we get shithoused and do some fingerpainting?
I dont care if he cant spell. Illiterate people need blowjobs too
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
Fuck you for setting me up with the guy from the Nickelback cover band
Payback for not stopping me from fucking the guy in the wookie costume
My masturbation fantasy just had a wedding theme. I need new hobbies.
I still owe him the card with all the sperm paper cutouts falling out like glitter saying " sorry you can't hold your load. Better luck next time "
I'm tryin a pb and onion sandwich now
Please smoke with me until I agree that sounds like a good idea
I feel like a pet sloth would complement my lifestyle.
Dude, I have everything I need for meth here.
YOU ARE NOT ALLOWED TO MAKE METH IN OUR APARTMENT.
His premature ejaculation problem is getting old.
Which president had the biggest dick?
Take your time, I'll wait
Randomize
