I wish my dick could take responsibilities for his own actions
After we fucked he shhhh'd me and said your welcome
Do ex girlfriends even count for summer sexcapades. Seems like the damage had already been done
Victory lap
If you were wondering whether I accidentally FaceTime called the undergrad who works for me in lab during a particularly graphic blow job last night, then the answer is yes.
I drink way too much to have a type. Last weekend I picked up a guy who calls me "baby girl"
I'm going to practice throwing things up the the air and catching them between my boobs, because that seems like a cool party trick.
Oh, and i love you too. Im just a selfish dick who had to talk about myself first
I want your cock.
All we are is dust in the wiiiiiiinnnnnnnnnnd
Yep, that just happened. My mom just gave me a big bag of drugs for my birthday. She even put them in a fancy bag with tissue paper.
On a separate note, I just found out some condoms aren't vegan. Problem.
Hahahaha I can't wait for you to ask "wait. are there any animal by products in that?"
I don't know what his name was or what he looked like, but I remember him rocking me to sleep with his cock
Yeah the last text says "How many your ass,,,,, prepare it" so take that for what it is
I actually haven't slept with anyone in a while. I think my whore phase is just seasonal.
just like fucking own it. stare that cop in the eye and just keep masturbating "yeah motherfucker Im high as shit and this feels great"
Yea and there’s destruction when we’re together, mostly of our livers but W/e
Randomize
