I bet farrah fawcett is having words with michael jackson in heaven for stealing her thunder
just googled chastity belt to see if it really exist..
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
Whats the count minus fat chicks?
This is one of those times where I really wish my vagina could tell me what happened last night.
You're getting a blowjob this afternoon. This has been your morning public service announcement.
I'm so sick
I would imagine. You did most of your drinking for brazil last night.
That and I think I got food poisoning from sharing nachos with that homeless guy..
If I had to summarise my weekend I would do so using the words "horrifying romanian moonshine"
Welcome to the difference between being FWBs (remember how we used to see who could get more lap dances a night?) and being in a relationship. Fun, huh?
I went through his pics. Will you go with me to get tested?
Why does fireball set life on fire? Your insides, your head, your behavior...
I feel awful. The bartender added me on Facebook and there's chips all over the bathroom floor
I HAVENT HAD A NICE A NICE DICK SINCE FEBRUARY!! I WANNA KEEP THIS ONE!!!
She gave me a collar. When I asked what this was for she replied "I'm taming your dick"
okay i know we havent talked for like weeks but i just really wanted to tell you that i miss your dick. like alot.
whose this? and thank you
Randomize
