I can text with my tongue
They are baked and once again have spent the last 45 mins talking about opening up a world wide business called "pickle on a stick"
i just bought plan b at the bus station. happy holidays and welcome to a new level of white trashiness.
you force-fed me gummy vitamins while screaming "I JUST WANT YOU TO BE HEALTHY" i have never been so terrified in my life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I found a ladder. I don't know where I am. Gonna climb it. I feel like aladin
Heed the warning of the ghost of Oktoberfest present: German beer is soooooooo much better than our watered down children's piss. also lost all my clothes and am wearing lederhosen the rest of the trip.
The world isn't going to end because you slept with him!
... that would be easier though.
he cock-blocks himself, don't try to make excuses for him!
I'm going to CVS to meet the Craigslist guy who is going to buy my underwear. If I don't text you within the next hour, plz assume that I have been abducted by a stranger with an underwear fetish.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
saying, "have a good fall!" After fucking a virgin boy is good etiquette, right?
IT WAS JUST SO LITTLE AND AWKWARDLY FLOPPING BACK AND FORTH
He noticed my new Lipstick so later tonight it's going to be on his dick.
My inner 10 year old alcoholic is intrigued.
I am really drunk and also a zombie.
i just realized i have only had sex on couches so far this year. i can't decide if that's impressive or trashy
Randomize