just got my goo swallowed for the first time. colors seem so much more vivid now, and more rainbows are outside
I got to work, greeted my staff, then went into the bathroom to throw up. Who hired me to run a business???
she's in the bathroom. spitting in the trashcan. not throwing up. just spitting and singing bad romance by lady gaga.
thatta girl
he just spelled fiance, "pheancie". I dont think he's ready to get married.
He fucked my earring out of my ear. Of course he's coming over again.
He showed up to fuck me at the same time the pizza guy did. It was like everything I needed just showed up at my stoop.
We had to go visit his dealer in the hospital to buy some weed.
Either call me back or tell me you're in jail. For fucks sake. If this is a cop, just help out. national league.
I'm sorry you couldn't sneak away today. You're the only guy I'm fucking that I can talk with about the other guys I'm fucking, and I need some advice
Life just isn't the same without him waking me up at 4 in the afternoon with a look of pity on his face...
dude, I convinced you I was your conscience for like 15 minutes last night. you weren't just "a little high"
But I got head on a boat yesterday which was sweet until a bald eagle flew over. Then it became life affirming.
Like why am I even still facebook friends with a guy I let finger me at a concert?
So I crawled off the trampoline to puke in the neighbors yard. Wonderful house guest right here
I farted in the parking garage and it echoed.
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